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The Bachelorette, "The Men Tell All"

Before I begin, I want to say that I realize I am now a full week behind on Pretty Little Liars recaps.  However, those are my favorite to write, and I put a lot of time into them, because I hope that I can make a couple people laugh.  So, I would rather they be late than low quality.  There will be two next week, after my class and internships are done for the summer. Okay, full disclosure – I usually find the Men Tell All episode, and After the Final Rose, to be incredibly boring.  Studio-induced drama just doesn’t excite me all that much, and I hate having to relive all of the awkward when the cast is in the hot seat.  But, to my surprise, this episode was pretty juicy.andi dorfman bachelorette

We start with Ashley and JP getting an ultrasound on stage to find out if they’re having a boy or a girl.  They’re having a boy, in case you were dying to know.  Then Ashley joked that they were going to name him Harrison (as in, Chris Harrison), and I melted and died at the same time.  I love the name Harrison!  Because of suspenders and AM, you know what I’m talking about.  But Chris Harrison?  Really?  DON’T NAME YOUR CHILD AFTER A TELEVISION REALITY SHOW HOST.

Anyway, there was a long preview of Bachelor in Paradise, and Crazy Baby Eagle Face is back!  Don’t know who that is?  Why, it’s Chris Bukowski, of course!  From Emily’s season!chris bukowski

Finally, all the guys came out.  They chatted for a bit about life after Andi, and then there was this big confrontation between Andrew and Marquel about whether or not Andrew said something racist and offensive on the very first night.  I have to say, Andrew is a skeeze, and Marquel is the perfect gentleman.  He refused to throw anyone under the bus, and I respect him for that.  Also, apparently JJ and Chris the Farmer didn’t get along?  They must have hid that from us as viewers so we would continue to love Chris so much, because I didn’t even realize.  Anyway, that went on for a while.

Then individual guys got in the hot seat.  First Marquel.  He chatted for a bit, there was a promo about him being on Bachelor in Paradise, and then he handed out cookies.  Marcus was next – he’s also going to be on Bachelor in Paradise.  Then Chris the Farmer.  And, what the heck?  This random girl from the audience came down to meet Chris.  Weird.  Studio ploy?  Charrison didn’t seem to know what was going on, but that doesn’t mean much.  She was Canadian and Farmer Chris got her number.  Nice.  Is that always long distance, to call to Canada from Iowa?

Then Andi came out.  This part was the most boring, because she was gracious and there wasn’t much drama with her.  Chrarrison read the results of the lie detector test aloud to everyone (except for Josh’s results, even though he lied twice!).  What did we learn?  Dylan prefers blondes to brunettes.  Marcus has slept with over twenty women (ewww!).  And Farmer Chris, Brian the Basketball Coach, and JJ the Pantsapreuer didn’t tell a lie.  Andi was in an awkward boat, because I’m sure she wanted to know what Josh’s lies were, but we don’t know if she picked him or not, and she obviously knows.

And then there were bloopers.

The end!

Who do you think Andi is going to pick?

-A.

Movie Review: The Fault in Our Stars

"We Are Tonight" by Billy Currington

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