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"The Oath" by Cher Lloyd featuring Becky G

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cqz713hhz1Y Look at that!  Advancement!  To be honest, I have known how to imbed videos in my blog posts for a while now, but just haven’t been using my knowledge each Monday for this post.  Why?  I can’t say, honestly.  But here you go!  Cher Lloyd can be my trial run.

This song is a couple of years old.  It wasn’t a big hit or anything, but when I heard it for the first time about a month ago, I knew that I had to post it today, June 9, 2014.

Why?

Because one of my best friends got married today.  Or maybe the wedding hasn’t happened yet?  I’m not sure, because I wasn’t invited.

I know what you’re thinking.  How is this one of your best friends, when you weren’t even invited to the wedding?  Well, I’ve told this story before, so I’m not going to get into it again.  Here’s the short version:

  • He is a boy.
  • I am a girl.
  • Can I make it any more obvious?  Oh, wait, that’s an old Avril Lavigne song.  And the basis of the problem, really.

What I was trying to say was, his fiancé (or potentially wife, now, if the ceremony has already ended) wasn’t a big fan of our friendship.  Which makes a little bit of sense, since I was in love with him for about a year.  But!  I’m over it now, and because I made the mistake of telling him about these silly feelings of mine, she strongly dislikes me, and I wasn’t invited to their wedding.

So, in a way, it’s my own fault.  But, since I have H now, and I’m so happily over my delusion that it makes me laugh to think back and remember, it also makes me sad that I was the only one able to get past it.

Anyway, that’s the long and the short of it.  So, why did all of this make me choose this song for today?  Well, the lyrics should make that pretty obvious.

Wherever you go, just always remember

That you’ve got a home, for now and forever

And if you get low, just call me whenever

This is my oath to you

Wherever you go, just always remember

You’re never alone, we’re birds of a feather

And we’ll never change, no matter the weather

This is my oath to you

I had to post it, even though I highly doubt he’ll read this.  Everyone is telling me to stop being so invested in the friendship, because it’s over now.  Once they’re married, our friendship is going to have to end.  I’ve even written that on this very blog.  But I don’t want it to.  It shouldn’t have to.

He was a big part of my life, of my transition years.  He listened to me, he made me laugh.  He was my partner in crime for a single summer, and it has stuck with me ever since.  I miss him.  And I hold those times very dear.  I can’t forget that, even if everyone else says I should.

So I sent him a wedding card and a gift anyway, even though I was told not to.  I texted him to wish him a happy day and good weather.  And I just hope that, one day, we’ll get to see each other again, as friends.  That we’ll get to share a small part of our futures with each other.

I really hope that’s the case.

Happy wedding day, D.

-A.

Biking to Work

Glacier National Park

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